Oh lawd

[Hamster power]

Don't keep hanging around each other after breaking up. i think that after a breakup you need some time apart to regain your sense of self again. at the least i think it should be 6 months before reconnecting again. you need that time apart so you both can grow up as a person, because if you stay friends and hang out, you might not be able to get over each other.

 

plus, if you hang out and start dating other people, then the one in the relationship is going to get cut out of the picture. that would leave whomever kinda abandoned. (unless u think you will be in a relationship first. if so, keep being friends with him.) XD

 

you need time apart to get rid of that emotion dependent feeling.

 

that's what i think anyways. hard to really say without knowing anything really about your relationship.

 

Good luck!

[Bubbles]

i know what he wants

 

3sum

[trakaill]

Good post cloud!

It was very painful for me to let go of my GF and when I came here for advice a lot of people laughed BUT your a girl/higherup so its different..

 

Anyway we kept in contact for a while, she left me for someone else, three weeks down the road we ended up sleeping with each other and the next day... well she was gone again... I got crush morally even more..

Im telling you this because I truly believe breaks are a VERY bad idea.. By now you should know whether you want to spend the rest or a longer time of your life with this person.. and it seems to me that it is not the case..

As cloud said "Sometimes when people are so close to each other, they tend to change who they are to make up for the differences in each other to get a happy and health relationship, but in actuality the couple have to respect each other's flaws and imperfections."

Take this, think about it, if thats what one of you has been doing break up and move on!! way to many times this stands true and long term relationship finish in fiascoes!

 

and many people tell you to follow your heart well thats BS. Your heart will want you to go the easy way very often (what will make it feel better)... take a step back and think with your head about what is REALLY good for you!

 

Its been a year and half since that incident for me and tbh I dont believe I have fully recovered from it yet but Im sure that there was NO WAY she was the right girl for me!!

 

I hope you figure it out

[Kennith]

Good post cloud!

It was very painful for me to let go of my GF and when I came here for advice a lot of people laughed BUT your a girl/higherup so its different..

 

Anyway we kept in contact for a while, she left me for someone else, three weeks down the road we ended up sleeping with each other and the next day... well she was gone again... I got crush morally even more..

Im telling you this because I truly believe breaks are a VERY bad idea.. By now you should know whether you want to spend the rest or a longer time of your life with this person.. and it seems to me that it is not the case..

 

Thanks, but its different because the relationship was of 5 years, and not 5 months. Not many people get into relationships thinking of the long term effects or even the future. Many don't have the experience of a long term relationship, theres no such thing as a perfect relationship and there will always be problems. They wouldn't be engaged for a reason if she didn't come to the conclusion that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. Not many experience the feeling of true love. A break to most means cheating, but to the rest it doesn't. I would sure know, and want a girl to be able to wait for me, cause I would sure wait for her. Don't mean to be blunt, but you chose the wrong girl, simple as that.

[SpaZMonKeY]

Sorry to hear about that Blargh, always sucks to have something like that happen.

 

Personally, I wouldn't bother with the "Just be friends" type of relationship. It won't work. Anyone says it CAN work, is talking out of their ass. I had tried being friends with an ex of mine back in high school, and it just led to horror. It'll also hinder any future relationships you may hope to have. Trust me when I say it won't work, no matter how hard you both try. It sucks I know, but it's just the way it is.

 

But it looks like you've gotten a lot of good advice already, and I hate to be negative saying not to bother being friends. Just saving you future hassle. But sorry to hear about you and your fiance, hope you find someone to make you happy in the future!

[XeNo]

Good post cloud!

It was very painful for me to let go of my GF and when I came here for advice a lot of people laughed BUT your a girl/higherup so its different..

I still laughed.

[Kennith]

Sorry to hear about that Blargh, always sucks to have something like that happen.

 

Personally, I wouldn't bother with the "Just be friends" type of relationship. It won't work. Anyone says it CAN work, is talking out of their ass. I had tried being friends with an ex of mine back in high school, and it just led to horror. It'll also hinder any future relationships you may hope to have. Trust me when I say it won't work, no matter how hard you both try. It sucks I know, but it's just the way it is.

 

As I said, comparing high school love to a 5 year relationship and engagement is just ridiculous. Of course it wouldn't have worked. That's your experience, simply saying that it won't work at all is just plain ignorance, sounds like you're the one talking out of your ass. No offense.

[XeNo]

As I said, comparing high school love to a 5 year relationship and engagement is just ridiculous. Of course it wouldn't have worked. That's your experience, simply saying that it won't work at all is just plain ignorance, sounds like you're the one talking out of your ass. No offense.

Cloud Strikes with Dr. Phil precision.

[NIKO]

This is a very tough situation for the both of you. If anything its most likely going to hurt more than really fix anything. When either of you start to date another person, that is when disaster can strike worst. Its painful to see someone you love and wanted to commit to, to be spending their time with someone else. You two should seriously talk (im sure you have). Remaining friends will be one of the most difficult things. If you guys really love eachother, and I am sure you guys do, it will work out. This could be an obsticle that will prove your guys' love for each other. I wish you guys the best of luck, and have confidence you guys are stong enough to work it all out. I know that we dont really talk or know each other that much, but i have a nack for advise and helping people, so if you ever need help shoot me a PM or chat me and I will lend my advice

[trakaill]

Thanks, but its different because the relationship was of 5 years, and not 5 months. Not many people get into relationships thinking of the long term effects or even the future. Many don't have the experience of a long term relationship, theres no such thing as a perfect relationship and there will always be problems. They wouldn't be engaged for a reason if she didn't come to the conclusion that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. Not many experience the feeling of true love. A break to most means cheating, but to the rest it doesn't. I would sure know, and want a girl to be able to wait for me, cause I would sure wait for her. Don't mean to be blunt, but you chose the wrong girl, simple as that.

 

If they are taking a break.. its not gonna work in the long term..plain and simple I dont care what you think..if she doesnt want to face that..her problem..my relationship wasnt 5 month and not in high school..people often stay together cause they feel they have to rather than want to

Xeno fuck you, you can suck it