Oh lawd

[Ketch]

Hey Ms.Blargh,

 

I really think this is a good idea if you want to save your friendship, and maybe even a relationship in the future. If you really do/did love him when you decided to commit to marriage; After a year of dating and not seeing each other i think you'll start to miss one another. I suggest that you do it, Get a crazy side, Everyone needs a break. He'll probably do the same thing, but he'll realize how much of an amazing woman you are and come straight back to you.

 

Well anyways i wish you the best of luck, and i hope everything goes well for you.

[Elleon]

Hey Ms.Blargh,

 

I really think this is a good idea if you want to save your friendship, and maybe even a relationship in the future. If you really do/did love him when you decided to commit to marriage; After a year of dating and not seeing each other i think you'll start to miss one another. I suggest that you do it, Get a crazy side, Everyone needs a break. He'll probably do the same thing, but he'll realize how much of an amazing woman you are and come straight back to you.

 

Well anyways i wish you the best of luck, and i hope everything goes well for you.

 

If you put a time limit on this, it will only create unneeded expectations and stress. Let things simply progress and happen, move forward without trying and acting at every turn.

 

People tend to set themselves up this way, and eventually fall, hard.

[SpaZMonKeY]

As I said, comparing high school love to a 5 year relationship and engagement is just ridiculous. Of course it wouldn't have worked. That's your experience, simply saying that it won't work at all is just plain ignorance, sounds like you're the one talking out of your ass. No offense.

 

Well that was purely an example. Personally, I am now very happily married for just about 4 years so far. I have had plenty of different relationships, that was just the one that related the most. Even for those in College or older, it is still EXTREMELY rare for a couple who have been together for years and even engaged/married to be friends after breaking up. My parents for example were married for like 20 years, and their love just disappeared. They are now split up, and try and stay "Friends" but most of their friend-like activities don't turn out very well. Does it suck? Yes it does, but that is life.

 

So please don't assume my opinion is meaningless, because it's directed at Blargh, not you. This threads for giving Blargh advice, not arguing who's advice is better.

[Elleon]

Well that was purely an example. Personally, I am now very happily married for just about 4 years so far. I have had plenty of different relationships, that was just the one that related the most. Even for those in College or older, it is still EXTREMELY rare for a couple who have been together for years and even engaged/married to be friends after breaking up. My parents for example were married for like 20 years, and their love just disappeared. They are now split up, and try and stay "Friends" but most of their friend-like activities don't turn out very well. Does it suck? Yes it does, but that is life.

 

So please don't assume my opinion is meaningless, because it's directed at Blargh, not you. This threads for giving Blargh advice, not arguing who's advice is better.

 

And you proved your point by defending yourself? Well, even though your post wasn't necesarrily directed towards Blargh, it depicts a common result and experience none the less.

 

EDIT: Hard to believe their love suddenly, disapeared, poof, just like that. Unless something very dramatic happened, most normal couples don't wake up one morning and suddenly stop loving each other. It is generally the result of years worth of problems, underlying or obvious, but predominent none the less.

[Kennith]

If they are taking a break.. its not gonna work in the long term..plain and simple I dont care what you think..if she doesnt want to face that..her problem..my relationship wasnt 5 month and not in high school..people often stay together cause they feel they have to rather than want to

Xeno fuck you, you can suck it

 

I don't want to be redundant and copy paste the exact thing I just said cause this deserves the exact same response I've already typed, so I'll just leave this here. In other words, not worth my time.

 

Just know you're an extremely inexperienced and insensitive person.

 

Well that was purely an example. Personally, I am now very happily married for just about 4 years so far. I have had plenty of different relationships, that was just the one that related the most. Even for those in College or older, it is still EXTREMELY rare for a couple who have been together for years and even engaged/married to be friends after breaking up. My parents for example were married for like 20 years, and their love just disappeared. They are now split up, and try and stay "Friends" but most of their friend-like activities don't turn out very well. Does it suck? Yes it does, but that is life.

 

Again, doesn't mean its like that for all. If my grandparents were still married after they split up and tried to be just friends and got back together, does that mean all relationships will end that way. No.

What she is doing is a mutual break, not a break up where they decide just to be friends.

 

So please don't assume my opinion is meaningless, because it's directed at Blargh, not you. This threads for giving Blargh advice, not arguing who's advice is better.

 

Trust me when I say it won't work, no matter how hard you both try. It sucks I know, but it's just the way it is.

But sorry to hear about you and your fiance, hope you find someone to make you happy in the future!

 

I didn't "assume" your opinion was meaningless, even though its directed at Blargh, the only reason why I had a problem with it, is how inconsiderate you were. How'd you feel if your marriage is coming to an end in 4 years and someone told you there is no chance. Don't give me that "thats just how life is" bs either, cause not everyone thinks at the same thought process as you, have some freaking decency.

 

 

BTW, Elleon gave great advice, and knows what hes talking about, you obviously have not read it after making your post.

[Bubbles]

blargh, you should take this time to find a nice guy within SG. they know how to treat a lady

[Kennith]

blargh, you should take this time to find a nice guy within SG. they know how to treat a lady

 

Your mom knows how to treat a lady.

[Bullet Wound]

So long as its mutual and neither of you harbor negative feelings towards each other I see no reason why you can't still be friends.

 

And I lol'd at bubbles statement, no one here is nice.

[trakaill]

And because it happen to your grand parents they are an example everyone will follow..funny...Im quite sensitive and yeah Im beginning my life just as much as you are but I have experience of other people around me..

 

Me dads second love, after him and my mom got divorced, did exactly what you said, she hid all her bad behavior to please my dad (she used to smoke pot, drink and party a lot before) my dad knew of it but was told it was in the past...after 7 year of relationship she suddenly flip out and couldnt hide it anymore.. left my dad and went back to what she did before she met him..no sign..nothing, just from one day to the other unlike what that other dude said

 

You totally misunderstood my point im not saying they cant be friend but a relationship after a break up rarely succeeds, even if you do get back together it most likely wont last for ever. culture/ upbringing changes how important you feel staying with someone you believe right for you ...

 

You said you werent a couple counselor and you are not just because you have an example of one thing it means its right I can give 1000000 stories of people in long relationship taking a break getting back together and failing... or poeple getting divorced from one day to the other without warnings.... your not love science incarnated

 

 

I don't want to be redundant and copy paste the exact thing I just said cause this deserves the exact same response I've already typed, so I'll just leave this here. In other words, not worth my time.

 

Just know you're an extremely inexperienced and insensitive person.

 

 

 

Again, doesn't mean its like that for all. If my grandparents were still married after they split up and tried to be just friends and got back together, does that mean all relationships will end that way. No.

What she is doing is a mutual break, not a break up where they decide just to be friends.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I didn't "assume" your opinion was meaningless, even though its directed at Blargh, the only reason why I had a problem with it, is how inconsiderate you were. How'd you feel if your marriage is coming to an end in 4 years and someone told you there is no chance. Don't give me that "thats just how life is" bs either, cause not everyone thinks at the same thought process as you, have some freaking decency.

 

 

BTW, Elleon gave great advice, and knows what hes talking about, you obviously have not read it after making your post.

[Kennith]

And because it happen to your grand parents they are an example everyone will follow..funny...Im quite sensitive and yeah Im beginning my life just as much as you are but I have experience of other people around me..

 

Me dads second love, after him and my mom got divorced, did exactly what you said, she hid all her bad behavior to please my dad (she used to smoke pot, drink and party a lot before) my dad knew of it but was told it was in the past...after 7 year of relationship she suddenly flip out and couldnt hide it anymore.. left my dad and went back to what she did before she met him..no sign..nothing, just from one day to the other unlike what that other dude said

 

You totally misunderstood my point im not saying they cant be friend but a relationship after a break up rarely succeeds, even if you do get back together it most likely wont last for ever. culture/ upbringing changes how important you feel staying with someone you believe right for you ...

 

You said you werent a couple counselor and you are not just because you have an example of one thing it means its right I can give 1000000 stories of people in long relationship taking a break getting back together and failing... or poeple getting divorced from one day to the other without warnings.... your not love science incarnated

 

And you totally misunderstood my post, cause the bottom half wasn't directed towards you. You didn't even read it right, cause I said just because my grandparents did end up that way, doesn't mean it will for others. Please, just stop making yourself look any more retarded. You posted a wall of text to a response that wasn't even directed towards you, and even misinterpreted by you.

 

You based your whole post on a misinterpreted statement.

 

If my grandparents were still married after they split up and tried to be just friends and got back together, does that mean all relationships will end that way. No.

Try reading it again, and this time slow down. But thank you for responding to spazmonkey for me.