My Official Farewell and "Resignation" Topic

[Kennith]

From this line to the next, I typed several months ago after the transition of Amit becoming owner of SG. I never posted it up because I felt it was unfinished, but at this point I decided to finally put it to rest. I originally wrote this for this specific topic: http://www.steam-gamers.net/forum/community-announcements/44117-resignation.html

 

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There is no substantial amount of words to express the memories and pleasurable times I've experienced for my short 3-4 years here in this extraordinary community, also known as SG. And it deserves a proper farewell from me as it's the only way I can return it's kindness. I've left plenty of times, mainly due to military "duties/training" and I've returned each time to see how crappy the community has gotten.

I've never posted a farewell topic (at least aside from these:

http://www.steam-gamers.net/forum/off-topic/44006-sooo.html

Which was typed up before I knew about the change of command and structure in the ranks.

And

http://www.steam-gamers.net/forum/off-topic/9910-thats-fucking.html

Which was just a troll topic to mimic all the leaving threads that were happening at that time.)

But in all seriousness I am posting a legit first "resignment" for the people who deserved it or care.

 

I went on vent a couple of times on and off to see what's been going on lately, and not to my surprise it's empty. I woke up once to a pretty "enlightening comment" about how I always "come back", but have I? I realized, I've always come to return to this forsaken place with or without a topic, but I thought I'd set it in stone for once, I'm gone, and have been gone, the last thing I've really sucked myself into the community for if you haven't realized was before the "Big Three" stepped down. After that I have not devoted or fully committed to this community as I once did. I saw what kind of unrepairable of a "community" this place was becoming and resigned without a resignation topic because again, I kind of was expecting to come back at the time, but just in case would have rather not type out a long essay and just get BD back the next week. I don't remember the last time I've logged on the servers, or payed attention to what has been going on. That was nearly 2 and a half years ago.

 

The recent events to have taken placed here in SG, I don't really care, yeah, so what, a "stranger" to the community has bought it out. As much as the shit that has been going on before, I didn't expect any less, this would never have happened or even thought possible to have happened if it had taken place a year and a half ago. It was extremely hard to get admin and it wasn't just coughing up 10 bucks and you getting it. You'd have to know basically each and every admin that has already been serving SG before you can even get considered to be approved. The apprentice program, and voting program that was added later on to allow admins in was maybe one of the worse ideas we've ever come up with, and I was always against it when I was on the board. I might have not been around for some of the discussion but I know I would have made my point if I was present.

 

 

(Before any of you tell me to stop crying, or gtfo, or to quit being an attention whore or an old fag. Just don't bother replying. There isn't a newfag or oldfag, like I've always said, this isn't 4chan, keep that stupid crap OUT of SG. There isn't a borderline between an "oldfag" or a "newfag" The ones who will take this topic to the heart will know this topic is directed towards them. The ones who have been around during that time, will reminisce. Vent at 2 in the morning, was always packed, eve-RY-single-PERSON was in one channel. Everyone was talking, everyone was having fun. I still think back to those memories, it wasn't just gaming with some random strangers on the internet. It was SERIOUSLY fun times I would never like to forget with coolest people I've met. I've had one of the best times of my life here.) (I heard most trolls are banned anyway now)

 

People knew each other, knew what they did, know what they were doing outside of SG on a personal level. We learned who to build trust with, and who NOT to build trust with. A lot don't realize that the difference between then and now isn't so much on who is managing it, but the faces of every single individual. You can no longer see those faces. The community in SG has become what every other community has become; its the same shit everywhere and nothing really special anymore. This next statement isn't directed towards anyone in particular, but people come here now, put on their "internet/troll" masks and become everything they are not just so they can get their big shot at being somebody like, CA, AO, or even BD, or even SG "Badass" all for the wrong reasons, and not for this community in itself. If you are done playing Mr. Boss or Mr. Coolio and have cleared your head a little bit, then come talk to me, talk to us, talk to whats left of the community. Power does a lot to someone, and many who have it, don't realize they've become major douchebags, again before anyone gets the wrong idea; this isn't just directed at one person, but to many people that I had to hold back from performing actions that are EXTREMELY uncalled for.

 

People who have/had power, like to brag/boast about it, such as putting their titles to "Former AO" or "Retired BD" (which all of these are really not too much of a problem) "Former so and so in military" "10 headshots in a row" "Best Akali in LoL 35-0" "Pounded 10 Jagerbombs" WHATEVER it is. Many don't know it, but I was in the Marine Corps, but you don't see me whipping my dick all around the place about how I fucking did this or that. Yeah I'd talk about, if the subject has ever arose. There's totally nothing wrong with that, but what I'm basically trying to say is nobody comes here anymore to just talk, socalize, make friends, to just simply chill...Too many are looking for recognition... Being in the Marines, you do see how much of a jerk someone becomes as soon as he picks up rank.If you have the intelligence, you would realize what you're doing and tone it down. I'm sorry, maybe I should have just said it to your faces, but you, yourself need to realize your own flaws and fix it. You're great people, I don't hate anyone, really, its hard for me to hate someone, everyone is distinguished in their own way. It's what makes you, you, but you need to change what you know to be your flaws because everyone has them, and it'd be kind of you to at least attempt to remove it. If you don't realize it then I'm sorry your parents raised you that way. Again, this is directed to many, and not just one person. I don't know if SG will be successful in the future nor do I know if it will fail, but I know one thing, if the current command continues to act like a bunch of immature teenage high school students, this community won't ever get anywhere further than it is currently. When you take the role of responsibility you forge the future of this community with how you manage it and how you treat it.

 

The ones who spend countless hours getting this community up and running are long forgotten, but I didn't forget. I didn't forget the time and effort they've all put in here. I didn't forget the time I spent with them, all those small memories, superficial to some...still laying around in my head. The countless mods/games, servers, jokes, nights, discussions, rants, bans, admin abuse, and etc; they'll be with me for a while, even 10 years from now. How many here still even speak to Haggard?

 

Many of you aren't close friends, but you are not strangers either. I thank you, all of you for what you've done, and for giving me those fun times. Coming from me, this probably doesn't mean two shits to some of you, but then again its probably most likely not directed to you. These memories will probably never happen again in my life, or even come close to it, because as older the internet gets, the younger it's users get, too. Too many take it for granted and do not notice how amazing it is. They are born with it, they are raised with it. For the more mature audiences, don't forget how it was for you when this amazing piece of technology came into our lives. You meet people you would never meet in your life, you can get to know somebody from across the world in a few seconds. I will never forget the first time I heard a British. Lol. For some, it's gotten people to be more aware of everything there is to know, and for others, it's gotten them to become more ignorant. Don't forget who you are, and that there are humans on the otherside of the screen.

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After this line, what I have to say is not for the weak hearted.

 

 

 

For those of you who don't know me, it might be because I have tried to keep my "existence" as secret as possible. This retired staff bar under my name is the first time I've seen it, probably because I was finally removed from SA after requesting to be bumped down to a REG for as long as I remember. Why? Because I don't like the attention, I don't like the suck ups and I prefer to just be among the crowd. However as time passed I noticed I really did become invisible, nobody talks to me anymore and nobody really gives a fuck who I am because I'm just a nobody here now. I don't know if its because of how I am or if it's because I'm no longer of status in this community, but one thing for sure is it's noticeable. I wanted to hold status for a while, but only as an LG because it was something I remember the current BDs of the time thought up of to put memorable people who DESERVED that recognition. Too many were moving up to CA for who knows what the fuck for so we decided to put something which is to become of the new "CA". I felt that it was a good spot to retire this empty husk of someone who poured his time and effort in this beloved community. People whined about how they couldn't get into LG and how they think they deserved it. Were you one of the first admins to ever have come to here? Would you have given a shit if it had 1 server with no vent and empty forums? Knowing this would you have invested tons of hours each day to something you didn't know would have succeeded or not? The ban system was much more complicated and longer back when I was AO. Did you actually care about MAKING this community into something instead of just WANTING to be something? If not then I don't care what the fuck you think, and neither will you care what I think, but you don't deserve it. You do not deserve the LG status. If you feel as if you are offended by this statement, you probably never deserved it in the first place. It was a sad sight to see so many people moved into LG before others who deserved it much more. It might sound like I'm bragging and butt hurt over something so stupid, and its because in a way I am. It was a sore to the eyes to see that the people who practically made SG and was a part of SG are fucking left in the dirt and simply no longer is given a single fuck by adding these cry babies to the rank of such. Eventually people who were AO and resigned were automatically given LG. I even once heard, and I forgot from who, told me they wanted AO just to retire to get into the LG group. I might be making a big deal out of something that seems stupid to you, but others seemed to made it an even bigger deal than I have. It started with the removal of HG, which I was against by the way, and then the removal of LG, which in a way was basically a removal of me because at that point I was too demotivated to continue to hang around. I asked to take away my SA status and for me to become regular because I refuse to be in any other position if it isn't in LG, but it wasn't given, instead I am now stuck with these two shitty words under my name because it seems more professional; so I'm forcefully categorized with the rest of the fucks as "Retired Staff". In vent, I even asked to get the REG/MEM tag, but it was not given. Because the veterans of whats left of SG decided that was too much of a pain to see me belittled to such a position, they insist on giving me Retired Staff, but to me that is much more of a belittlement than the position I ask for so they settle with SA.

 

I could sit here for the next 6 hours and type about each single individual that I have kept close in my heart and memories, but there are far too many and they should all know who they are. The memories of each passing day in the years I've put in this community are unforgettable. Instead of waking up to go hang out and grab a drink. I'd just hop on vent and I'd get all of that in my own home, as corny and no lifeish as that sounds, it's true because it was that great. I had my quarrels with many members, but I hope they still do not take offense to it. At times it got to be really stressful babysitting a bunch of kids and respond to hateful PMs on why they were banned and such. If I've banned you in the past it's not because I hate you, but because I had to, to give the most unbiased decision I could offer.

 

Many of you still hang around here not knowing how everything came to be, probably because it doesn't concern you, but ignoring the old time members is like ignoring how the universe came to be. The scale amoung the two are great, but in actuality they are the same. You use these forums and not know a single thing about what has gone on here and how it came to be. Simply because you are too busy sucking the current AO's and BD's dicks. Because that's all that matters, you come here to get SA, you come here to get AO, you come to get a shot at being something, you come here... for the wrong reasons and that my friends is why this community is rolling into a big pile of shit.

 

Can you honestly tell me to my face that it's better now than it was 3 years ago? But is it your fault you don't know who the heck anyone is? It probably isn't. After all, Any trace of them was removed with the removal of LG. Back then many wanted to be a part of the community, not a part of a stupid rank and two letters next to their names. They read everything about what went on in the past years, they were interested in the story this site had to offer. It was amazing to me how people knew about stuff that even I had forgotten. I've asked...if I came back would I get BD and I got a yes, I was curious and only curious to see if I'm still trusted by what seems to be my child, our child, SG. I didn't want it. I might seem fucking cocky for saying this, but I know for sure if I had come back and put in the time I had put in it before, I can somewhat turn it around. I know, but is it worth the effort? Why should I dig SG out of the hole that I had tried so hard to not put it in for so long? Why should I clean up some other person's dog shit that's has been smothered all over SG?

 

Many of you will in some way think this is all a big emo topic and that I am just looking for some attention and that I want power back or to be known, in all honesty, if you don't care who I am or care about what I have to say, I most likely don't care about you either. Whether I know you or not I am doing this for every single person out there who deserves this. The last of my time I am devoting to you. Fucking cheers.

 

 

-Kennith

 

 

 

 

 

For me to simply post this and continue to type this wall of text shows that I still care for SG, it was my home after all for 3 years. Originally I planned to go down the list and type something for each person, but instead I'll just pick certain names that I can think off on the top of my head right now. This is not for attention or to suck up cause there is no longer a need to, but a thanks, a kudos to let these people know I haven't forgotten them. In no particular order:

 

 

@Haggard - The one and only. I will never forget the first time I met you, even though you have constantly forgot about me over the course of my time here, hahaha. Working with you was an honor and I don't say that to every person I've "worked" with. You are a genius and I always wondered how you come up with the shit you do. You spent such a huge chunk in your life to SG and I hope you get somewhere far in life because you deserve it. To balance your real life problems with the problems of SG. When there were things I didn't think we'd come out of, you'd pull something right out of your ass and handle it. You built this community from the ground up only to see it in a way get destroyed. Aside from how well you took control of things you always left room for my opinion and for the respect you showed me, I show you nothing, but respect in return as well. I always enjoyed hanging with you whether it'd be for odd short conversations or all nighter COH games. There's many memorable moments that I can recall, but there would be too much to type. I'm truly glad I got to know you and worked under you as well.

 

@Atarian - I never knew you or spoke to you, but one thing for sure is I haven't forgotten about you. You've done so much for this community that hardly anyone knows about. You never asked for any recognition or thanks for the shit you've done and I thank you for that.

 

@Henda - First person I pretty much spoke to on mic and it was in a CNC game I think. I hated and loved working for you both at the same time. You, too, have put in so many hours into SG. You were the first person I met of your kind and have actually befriended. You gave me tons of laughter and it was an experience working with you as well. It's been a pleasure, mate.

 

@Tampon - You always made me feel proud to actually be in the Marines, because you are about the only person where I mentioned it once and you didn't forget from then on. You were the first person to where I actually believed when you said how awesome it is for me to be enlisted in the USMC ARTILLERY. A lot doesn't give a fuck, but you rubbed it in plenty of times, asked me questions and was just in general, interested. You're fucking genuine as fuck and that's what I liked best about you. I never really spoke much or said much to you, but that was because I didn't know what to say. I wish I hung around you more often because you seem to be one of the more "real" people around. I hope you're doing well in life, now.

 

@Litkey - I was at first pretty pissed about what you did. Even though I did say I might be stepping down you did something without my consent to do what was basically payback, but I miss you. You were like a brother to me. One of the funniest guy's I met and we made a good team. Had a lot of fun during our troll days. I wonder how you're doing now, and I hope everything is going great for you.

 

@Zero001 - Not much to say but where the fuck are you? Are you dead? In jail? Everyone's wondering where the fuck you are, dude.

 

@Astrum - To me you are one of the smartest people I know of and you're very articulate. For a while I thought you knew everything. I occasionally asked you retarded shit and you'd just tell me, well do I look like a "so and so" and it made me realize you're just like everyone else. You put so much time into this community as well and did a lot of the technical work as well as forum work. You did tons of research just as Haggard did and was a great asset. I always wanted to work with you and make SG a better place, but I always kept getting demotivated by what shit SG got into in the first place. I apologize for procrastinating so much and giving you the full burden for what seem to have happened multiple times. I truly did want to work with you and clean up this place and I hope you didn't misunderstand. I'm glad you introduced me into all of those games you showed me, and it was awesome playing with you, but like with every other game I get bored fast and move on to the next. I loved the videos, love the games, and loved the conversations and don't for a second think that I didn't. It was interesting to me. I haven't spoken to you in a while, and I hope you don't take that the wrong way, I just don't know how to start a conversation other than with "what you been up to?" I remember you went through a few personal issues that you tried to keep hushed. Your mindset was, "this is a community for gaming, not your personal life," but I think you got that wrong. We're all friends here, and once a family. If you had shit to talk about, we were all here for you.

 

@Potshot - It was a great pleasure gaming with you and we've known each other for quite a while. I remember a while back you got warned for something that I do all the time, and well rules were rules as stupid as they seemed; I had to punish you. Using admin powers without the tags. I might have seem like a hypocrite back then, but in a way, I don't make the rules completely by myself and I had to enforce them. For a while you were trying to find every single thing you could bring up to get me in trouble. Don't deny it either because it was clearly noticeable lol. But I'm glad you eventually phased out of that. Just as with Astrum, I found you really knowledgeable and came to you for a lot of my questions and I thank you for wasting your time with me ahaha. You're a cool guy, but you got a huge ego for it. It's not a necessarily bad one, just don't flaunt it so much or it might seem that way. You were one of the many people that I loved to game with because you took it as serious as I did. You were also really easy to converse with. We might not have spoken to each other as much as we spoke to others, but you always talked to me as if you knew me for a while. (at the time) Oh how I miss your antics in CS, COH, L4D, KF and you yelling out in the mic. It was fun while it lasted.

 

@Garfield - You were a great friend, and I loved being around you, most of the time, no homo. (maybe a little) But as time passed it was harder and harder for me to say things to you to tone you down a bit. I felt like I had to keep you in check a lot of the times and I didn't know what you were thinking about the fact that I was doing that. If you noticed, I stopped talking to you as much as I did once you became BD, only because I didn't know how the power went to your head. I didn't know if you still took value to my opinions or if you think it was annoying. I saw how you spoke about others with me and I wondered if you did the same when my back was turned. Overall I let my insecurities get the best of me and ultimately led to our "confrontation". You signed on to TCP's account and asked me what I thought about you. I said everything that had built up inside of me and let it out and tbh I kind of knew it was you, but I said those things anyway. I can only imagine how much it hurt you after hearing something like that from a good friend, but I think you deserved it. You never meant any harm and I was always there to control that chaotic behaviour. You helped me out a lot and I helped you out a lot as well, but in the end in a way I kind of betrayed that. Ultimately, did I make up for my debt? I would think so. A lot don't know that you had already saved SG from the same fate you put it in. You bought SG off of Haggard to make sure it didn't go in the hands of a stranger. You were a good person, but you lacked the skills of managing at a micro level. (I'm sure you can manage considering you own like 5 hotels, but I mean at a smaller level) You had nothing, but good intentions which is why I couldn't comprehended why you put SG in the same fate you saved it from. I thought about it for a while and eventually just decided to forget about it. You must have had your reasons. Good luck with life.

 

@TCP - TCP, you were like my younger brother from another mother! lol. That high pitched British accent voice in Zombie Mod, telling us to blow up the bridge! And look how you've grown. You were extremely smart for your age and by all means you had the right to lie about your age at the time. People like you are a fine example of how we should give everyone a chance regardless of their age. You even knew a few things Astrum didn't know and he's got like 10 years on you. You're knowledge about servers and hacks helped SG a lot. It's safe to say we wouldn't be here right now if it wasn't for you as well as many others. I know how it's like growing up with a community on the internet. A lot of the people here effect how you turn out, and your personality as you get older. It was fun trolling and stuff but at times you went overboard and I could tell you got that from certain members of the community, but I was always there to try and tell you what's right. I hope you're doing great now and you aren't being too much of a jerk ahaha. Because shit rolls down hill and there's going to be some new 13 year old that's going to branch off from one of your personalities, so try to be a good role model ahaha. I don't know when we started to drift from each other, but I hope you keep in touch more often.

 

@Paul - You're a really down to earth guy. You're attitude says it, your voice says it, everything about you does. For the few encounters and things we've done together. I really enjoyed it. You were actually the only person I approved of hanging around my younger sister because I can't trust too many of the guys around here ahaha. You put so much time into the minigames server, which came up to be a big hit and a big part of SG. It won't be forgotten. To me you kind of started the minigames trend or have just made it really popular and you should be proud of that. You put the memories of SG and it's past into your maps and I thank you for that. It was enjoyable to watch all the familiar names and faces that were once plastered all over SG. So now I return the favor and give thanks to you for your accomplishments.

 

@James+Havok - You were the admin right after me. Number 8. James, the connection you and me have is just hard to explain. At times we won't talk to each other in months, but we'll still maintain that relationship of good friends and talk as if we had never had those few months gap. What I remember most about you is that time on the Hell_Arch map; you said you were getting admin along with your brother Havok, who's name at the time was something like moo cow or something? no idea ahaha. You both seemed like really awesome people and even Havok seemed really friendly at the time. It's just extremely unfortunate that he's been hanging around the wrong people and have taken up bad influences into his current personality (trollish). I still like him, but there's things that I can do without haha. You might not have done much, due to your inability of understanding any server work ahah. But you tried and you tried, and you still stick around. Thanks buddy.

 

@Niko - One of the oldest people to hang around SG, and it's sad to see that you suffered the same fate as many others, long before it has started happening. You come back again and again checking up on what used to be our place to hang. It was really hurtful to me to see that you were only given HG and even that was stripped away from you. Everytime you came on you just wanted to accepted. You spoke to everyone, got to know everyone and even though you can be awkward at times you were always lookin for somebody to chill with. We hardly speak, but that doesn't change that fact that you're a good friend, too Niko. You are one of the first people I actually got to know on a personal level with and we'll always be friends.

 

@broncoty - It was real cool getting to know you and you are one of the forgotten. Your words still held value when I was around, but it might not be so much anymore. You were one of the first around here to get a life, too. lol. I still remember our fun times in zombie mod especially that one time I was camping at the pit in that map, the red room, where there was a bunch of teleports around and I kept shooting you into the teleport, eventually you got me hahaha. Hope you randomly come on sometime in the future and see that you're still in the thoughts of many. It's been nice meeting you.

 

@Jager - I have to admit, I don't talk to you much, but only because of how awkward I feel around you. Quite a few times from what it seems to me you seek my approval on many things I wouldn't be able to tell you about. I just sit there, thinking, why the hell is he asking me? You're a lot smarter than me and I know there was some issue before about not involving the board, but IMO when it came to technical work, you can do w/e the hell you want because I wouldn't have been able to give a 2nd opinion on it. Aside from all that it was great working with you, and thanks for all the help on my technical issues with my PC, you always kept working on it till you could find what was wrong, but you were trying to recommend some BASIC BASIC things for me to do. I'm not completely computer illiterate, you know. I hope you're still doing what you do best for SG and wish you a great future.

 

@RavenManiac - You're one of my favorite people to be around, but then again everyone wanted to be around you. Everytime I join a game with you, it's just fun and laughter. I couldn't help but think you hated me, though. haha It's always felt like you've tried to avoid me. I guess you're busy with life these days and your new gal. Secretly everyone hoped it didn't work out, just so you can return. You were a huge phase, yes PHASE in SG and I'm grateful you were a part of this community. I'll never forget you.

 

@Suri - I heard a lot about what went on when I wasn't around and how you managed this community when you were BD. It's unfortunate that you let the power get to your head, but honestly rumors aside, you were a good guy. I didn't have any problems with you until that misunderstanding we had. Who knows how things would have turned out if you had just typed out the "-". So in a way it wasn't my fault, just miscommunication which seems to be the majority of my problems with people. I, in a way slapped you in the face so I apologize, but I honestly didn't know. I hope you aren't the type to hold a 2-3 year long grudge. You were undoubtedly a good part of SG history.

 

@Amby - My buddy. You're real, what more can I say ahaha. I've enjoyed that time period when you, Green, Juku and me all went on our Warhammer spree and did nothing but WARHAMMER ALL DAY back in 08'. I think I can say it was THE best moment of my life just kickin it with you guys. It was an awesome group, with a huge amount of diversity. I always wanted for that to return, but I guess that might be asking for too much. I try to keep in touch, but it's hard to. You seem really busy most of the time and when I try to talk to you, you just seem to drift off 30 minutes later, I know how it is with you, always getting distracted and stuff, but man can't you just chill with us once in a while. I miss you, dude. I'm being sincere when I say that if I ever meet you guys irl, I would have no problem being myself. The only thing I regret is not hanging around with you guys more. Little did I know that what we all had was too short. Too many memories, and too many good times. It was the most fun I've had and totally beats hanging out with my rl friends. I wish I chose you guys back then, instead of disappearin to go out. Still waiting on that game where we can all just kick it in vent again.

 

@Green - The guy who didn't validate his account for a whole year on SG. The only guy to have Haggard validate his account FOR HIM instead of through an email. The funniest guy I've ever met. I've never seen anyone with your sense of humor. I'm extremely glad I met you, no homo. Not much to say considering I still talk to you time to time on steam. I just felt like I should add you amoungst this group. I'll see you around.

 

@Juku - It's unfortunate that you built yourself a bad reputation around here, but I'm glad you came into the community. You are one of the few who didn't take to my aggressiveness when it came to debating on things. When you were AO, you got a lot of shit done and contributed as much as you could, it's just a shame that one mistake can turn this away. I'm glad I met you and I'll see you when the next mmo comes out I guess.

 

@mNote - You're weird, dude. That's one of the main reasons why I didn't give you my number when you asked for it. I like your ridiculous antics that you come up with. Basically the flavor of the month for you, but what I don't like is how much you remind me of my real life friend that I no longer speak to. You gotta know when to stop pressuring your views on others, like trying to persuade me to go on your stupid pyramid scheme. If you wanna talk, you can talk, but when I feel like you're just trying to annoy me on purpose you won't get much out of me. You're one of the closer friends I've had around here in SG and still are. You've been a huge, huge, huge part of SG. Way back before SG was even SG, before ZM was even ZM. We've moved from game to game, and that's another thing I like about you, but you did that a lot faster than I do. Thanks for sticking around SG to even this day.

 

@JeN - When I first met you it was on the ZM map "run_bitch_run" Ahaha. We were trying to go through the maze and I followed you through it, a zombie turned up in front of us and I didn't turn back fast enough and got you killed; after that we both agreed that we hated the map. You're probably wondering why I still remember this, but I remember a lot of random things about a lot of people. I also remember that you're two days older than me. Like I said earlier, I always got this vibe that you never really liked me, so I never took the time to actually speak to you or get to know you, but I do consider you a good friend and I always had no problem getting along, but for some reason I just got that vibe which probably added to the distrust ahaha. You're one of the few people where I'm actually careful with what I say because I just feel like what we have is fragile and I don't really want to break it. When it comes to SG duties, a lot of the times you and me looked at things the same way. We agreed with each other on many of the issues and I was glad to have someone like that on the team. At first I didn't know if it was just you agreeing or if that's what you truly thought, but soon found out it was when the same issues arose for you and I ended up agreeing with you instead. Eventually, you started to fall upon the problems I had which was basically everything getting piled on just one person, but I remember I had to get you to realize that even though that's true, you and me are just too quick on the bans and map adds that nobody really can get around to due to 'real life'. (during the time I was actually doing something) I don't fully remember how that went, but I'm glad you put so much time and effort as I did into the community just to help it grow. We never got paid; we were never forced; we just did work. I've had a lot of fun on the servers and I liked it when it was just you and me for a while during those late nights on zombie mod. We did ridiculous things and stuff that honestly anyone else would get banned for, but we made it fun and we knew our limits, so it never got out of hand. I'm glad you got me back into RO that one time, because it's now basically just nostalgia on top of nostalgia ahaha. I wish we could play more. I tried to get you back into it that one time, but I guess you had some issues with it and then in return a month later you tried to get me back into it, but I was probably too stuck on some other game. What I remember most was last year October, I was going through some extremely rough problems, I always spoke to the same two people and I felt I was too much of a burden to keep pestering them. So I asked you to come on vent to talk, because I just needed somebody to talk to. To my surprise you actually agreed. I told you the jest of it, bawwwing and you listened, even though it was only for 30 minutes or so since you had to go to bed, I'm glad you were there for me. I won't forget your kindness and neither will SG.

 

@Xeno - There is "Green" funny and then there is "Xeno" funny. I love your humor so much and I always have. It's always, and I mean always a pleasure to CS with you. Your voice matches your personality and so does your jokes. Beth is extremely lucky to have someone like you (no homo) because her life would just be filled with laughter. I never understood why so much of the community at the time hated you. You did a lot for the community and I always wanted to push you up there in rank, but due to the biased nature of the community you never really got it. You were always on the look out for hackers and even once questioned me. I remember it as clear as day, I was camping at spawn on the inferno map, and one deag'd you as soon as you came out of apartment. It was mainly luck and you went and reviewed the demo anyway, only to find out it was legit. I didn't take any offense to it, but was actually honored that you would think that. Hahaha. Why aren't you on my steam list anymore?

 

@Beth - I'm glad you came over to SG and despite all the drama that's happened between you and the members of SG, I tried to cover for you the most I can without looking like I'm favoring you. It was pretty unjust and wrong for people to look for every small thing to get your admin taken away and I kept pushing and pushing to get you to keep it. You did a lot and were one of the more active admins and I tried my best to get you to keep it. I don't know why SG wanted to turn away one of the more contributing admins in the first place. You've been a great help in making this place grow.

Now that the formalities are aside. I'd like to thank you and Xeno from the bottom of my heart. You two are still the only two who actually STUCK with me the whole time during of what went on last year in October. I can never show enough gratitude in my life time and will forever be in debt to the both of you. Nobody else in my life has heard or seen me the way I was and I had nobody to turn to, I'm so thankful that you two were around and there to comfort me. I called during odd hours because I couldn't sleep and woke you two up and what do you two do? You don't tell me to call some other time, you don't yell at me for waking you up, you answer my call. On top of that you had no service in your house and you both drove out at 3 in the morning just to help me. And you didn't just do this once, not twice, but you both talked me through it every night. You listened to countless amount of hours of my bickering and what I had to say, you both were never forced to. I did crazy things and said a bunch of random stuff at times. I took so much of your time during that month. You both took the time out of your life, the time out of your needed sleep, and took so much of the burden off of my shoulders and took them as your own to help me recover. During this point you two weren't just dealing with your own stresses in life but my own as well. I honestly don't know how you two dealt with me... I needed somebody to talk to really bad during those times and I felt like I couldn't go on. The impact you two left on me is so huge that everytime I think back about those days I almost always end up with tears in my eyes. TBH, I probably wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for you two. You two should be proud. I can't express myself enough on how glad I happened to meet you two here on SG. This is what SG needed and this is what SG was all about.

 

@Blargh - At first it was hard for me to find any common ground with you, but the more I started hanging out with you, the more I started finding a lot of things I can relate to you about. You've always been trying to get a few group things going and I kind of in a way turned them down mainly due to the timing of it all lol. You know, you should probably ask to do all that before you start drinking and save it for us, after all it's more fun that way. I miss the OMGpop nights with you all and it was always fun, even more so when Potshot gets drunk with you. You helped me out when we were just strangers and you didn't have any problem doing so. In return I gave you advice and I thought my debt was paid, instead you gave it right back and helped me out when I needed it. I never expected for all of that to hit me because I shut a lot out. In the end I made the same mistake I've made before and didn't even take heed to my own advice. I always thought you were older than me for some reason, much older, but it turns it wasn't such a huge age difference. You also always talk like you're drunk and when you are drunk you talk like you're crazy. It brings a smile to my face when I think about all the times I've heard you drunk over vent. Yelling out how you can't breathe, falling down the stairs, sending your brother to get you more vodka, and lots more. I think I can say that I never met anyone that remotely resembles you. Hahaha. Keep in touch.

 

@Virdebello - You've been around SG for awhile and you got your own sense of funny. The jokes and pranks you pull are all very well-played. You're another one of my closer friends in SG and the things you do and done won't be forgotten. I remember the first time where I realized you were a fucking mischievous troll. It was on L4D first level. I told you 1000 times not to shoot the car and what do you do? Shoot the car. I thought you were an idiot and I was actually pretty pissed, until the 2nd time you did it. I just started laughing because the way you acted was as if you didn't have a clue what was going on and I realized I was just being messed with. I can look back at it now and imagine you laughing behind that screen, watching the team rage over that. Another memorable time was when we all got on tinychat, me included, first time I even remotely showed myself to anyone in SG and we both had on gas masks. The same night, you got so drunk you fell asleep on your chair with the webcam still up; Amby did the same thing as well. Your roommate had to wake you up. It's been really fun and we'll chill if any other game worth playing comes out.

 

@Keylin - You stuck around for almost as long as I can remember and you don't ask for things in return. You were active in the community itself and wasn't around just for the glory. You denied admin for so long and never once asked for it or even tried to attain it. Playing on the servers and with other people was enough for you. There are many people around like this and still are. I had great times chillin in vent with you and the rest of the Divas. You all were plainspoken and pretty awesome in general. At times I never spoke much and I enjoyed the rambles and noise that went on in that channel and that was enough to feel like I had the company of many others. I enjoyed the laughs and good times while it lasted. I still think back about all the crazy things we did or talked about. I remember watching movies with everybody every night and it was just a constant party. I got to know everyone and I really did in a way felt part of the "Divas." One of my most memorable moments with you was that one guy who was streaming and asking questions and taking requests online. I forgot who was in the channel, but you all thought I was AFK. You were telling him to tell IScout that he was a newb. I was watching with you all and basically just lurking and I thought it would be funny to pull something unexpected. So I called the streamer up and told him to say that Keylin was a newb and you didn't recognize the voice and was yelling out who did that in the channel and since there was only about 5 of us you asked if it was me and I just started laughing on the vent, after that we started to talk more. There were unlimited things to talk about with you and I felt like there was nothing I couldn't say. I brought up subjects that I would think would be boring to most and you had no problem taking interest. It was great to have somebody listen to my pointless rambles about random things and show a side of me not many knew about. If you were as interested as you put off then you could do great things cause all it takes is interest and anybody can have the capability. You were an extremely close friend, but unfortunately I ruined that. I let my hobby of gaming get out of hand and just like with everyone else I stopped speaking with you as often and only did when what seemed like I was bored. I guess I never realized it myself and lost track of time, but everybody else accepted this side of me. I apologized, but I guess after hearing it so many times it lost it's value somewhere along the way. You said it was fine, but I can tell when it really wasn't. I hope you believe me when I say that those words were always true and straight from the heart and not just said because that was what I thought you wanted to hear, unfortunately the only thing you have to go by are my words. I don't have anyone else to blame, but myself that I lost a good friend. It's been a pleasure to have you be a huge part of my SG life and I hope you're still doing great.

 

@Good Tyrant - I didn't know whether you were acting or not, but you were oblivious to many of the things that is known on the internet. It was funny to see how you progressed through the years here in SG. I told you most of what I thought already somewhere in this topic and I don't really have much else to say, but it was hard to know if you really had interest in the topics or music I gave because you're just too nice at times. You mostly talk to me when you're drunk. You used to always say what's up when I come on, but now you just always seemed to get dragged into another channel or become occupied with something else so I don't know how much I am to you anymore. I think that's enough about my insecurities. Aside from all that I had a really great time during those late nights with the gang and I'm glad that you all accepted me into your channel. Ahaha. Who knows how things would have turned out today if I never just popped in. I wouldn't have it any other way. It was great fun and I miss it. You're a good friend and thank you for sticking around in SG.

 

@Target - I don't know what you're doing these days and where you've been, but I want you to know that I thought you were awesome. You always had stories to tell and humor was a bonus. I always asked for you because the Diva channel was a lot more active with you around. I don't know what made you decide to leave or become inactive, but I wish it stayed that way for a little while longer. I remember one time, you and Keylin called one of the Disney operators and asked if you can sing a song to them and you both sang, as a duet, one of the songs from "The Little Mermaid" and after you both were done, I'm not sure if I'm just making this up or something, but you can hear clapping in the background. It was too long ago, but I do remember something like that. Ahahaha. Thank you for sharing this wonderful memory, along with many other memories. I hope you're doing great now and having a fun time somewhere. Once a Diva, always a Diva.

 

@Highsky - Take this as a compliment, but you reminded me of Paladin, not cause of your voice or how you act, but because of your dedication to sticking to the rules. Not going to say any names, but a lot didn't take you seriously or would think you would have made a good BD. So we decided to in a way, "test" you and put you into AM. Don't take this offensively, but you should be honored that you actually brought that rank back ahaha. I knew you would make a good admin, although at times you are really strict, more so than I, I thought that the other admins would keep the balance. Since you were the hammer, many of the others were nails, neither are more important than the other because without each other, both are useless. I called dibs to make that promotion topic and I don't regret it. It's been a great pleasure to have you around.

 

@Paladin

 

@Obez

 

@Spartan

 

@Falcon

 

@Modgers

 

@Mikey

 

@Mick

 

@Jaffa

 

@Edo

 

@Venomousfate

 

@JackSparrow

 

@Hazardous

 

@Lux

 

@LVG

 

@Svendy

 

@Mystique

 

@Huwajux

 

@Bob Loblaw

 

@Skitz

 

@Slavic

 

@Pancake Batter

 

@Itch

 

@Dalar

 

@Harpreet

 

@Psyche

 

@ChainedLord

 

@Fullmetal

 

@Hiphop

 

@Ngo

 

@Killermidget

 

@Blank

 

@President Shadow

 

@Gunner

 

@The General

 

@Matt (2007 Version)

 

@Futtbucker

 

@Yellow Invazn

 

@Riggs

 

@DoubleSb/Gantza - STFU, I DIDNT INCLUDE YOU CAUSE I BEEN TALKING TO BOTH OF YOU FOR THE PAST FUCKING YEAR ANYWAY, SO STOP CRYING ABOUT HOW I DIDNT INCLUDE YOU IN HERE. I DIDNT INCLUDE CAUTION AND YOU DONT SEE HIM BEING EMO. MAKES ME SAD TO BE AN ASIAN. With Love, Kennith

 

 

I know most of these people haven't even logged on the forums in almost a year, but I thought I'd still give them a shoutout, cause its the thought that counts.

If you are wondering why the hell you aren't on here its probably because we still actively talk. Just sayin. =_=

 

I know this is a hefty amount of names (might be more) and I'm taking a while to type it, but with finals and all and also being sick doesn't really help too much. Words are the only way I can express my feelings to how much SG meant to me. And before turning that page completely I would like to do it right. Thank you for bearing with me.

 

More to come.

[PotshotPolka]

I, for one, welcome our new narcissistic overlords.

[Zeke]

Holy shit, you're writing more?!

[NIKO]

I have been here since the begining of this community, and i feel your pain in all the bullshit and change that has gone on.. its tough to go from well known admin to a complete stranger. Its a struggle to keep up with the changes and new members. I will forever be ZM, and you will always be a friend ken.

[Nasu]

I'm sorry Cloud but tl;dr ):

[SilentGuns]

Will miss you Cloud . It started raining outside as I read this .

[Harry]

I'm sorry Cloud but tl;dr ):

It's very much worth the read.

[mapper]

I love you for your kind words dear sir

[Revolution18]

Well kennith or cloud iv seen you on or played with but thank you. You inspired me. Thank you so much!

[Kennith]

I'm sorry Cloud but tl;dr ):

 

I'm sorry Nasu, but I got a hard time remembering who you are, and you don't seem to care so not a single fuck was given.